It’s not like I’m obsessed. I just like watching her. I look at her a lot—but that’s not a crime. It’s not hurting anyone—it’s not like I’m a weirdo. I work. I pay taxes. I buy Girl Scout cookies.

When I go out, I watch people, and honestly, I prefer being by myself; observing, and listening in on other people’s conversations. They’re so creepy and dishonest. Only saying things they think the other person wants to hear. They’re fakers.

But me, I’m sincere and extremely excited as I take a peek. I know she knows I’m watching. She flaunts her wet, naked body—she looks straight at me. If only my goldfish could talk, it would be perfect.